hermionesviolin: (self)
HBS did layoffs today (as did the rest of the University, I believe).  I gripe that we are nearly unfireable and the incentives system is poor and I gripe about particular people I work with, but actually looking at someone having gotten laid off... it's a human being vulnerable and in pain.  (Yes, I was actually surprised that I had this reaction -- I have a self-identity as a misanthrope in certain contexts, what can I say?)

Edit: I hadn't found any official press release on the HBS webpage, but it occurred to me later to check the HBSNews Twitter. Huh. /edit

***

I am unimpressed by my World Religions class (the prof just doesn't quite do it for me) and think I will just listen to the lectures during work from now on, reserving Tuesday and Thursday evenings for things I will get more out of.

At one point during our phonecall tonight, L. was like, "Oh, there was a religion-related class this fall that I was supposed to tell you about but now I can't remember what it was."  She mentioned "Dreams and The Dreaming" but couldn't remember if that was the class she had been thinking of.  Poking around the website some, I'm actually tempted by "Race in the Americas" (thanks, RaceFail).

***

joy sadhana )
hermionesviolin: image of Claire Bennet from the tv show Heroes looking up at the sky (face up (and sing))
Our power went out this morning, but I woke up at 6:37 (having gone to bed around 10:15), which because it was a weight room day meant I still had time to do my full planned workout at the gym.

Words of wisdom (and comfort) from mjules:
"Sometimes one-sided things are a little difficult to deal with, even when we're mostly okay with it."
"I don't think you're particularly cranky. Just having a lot tossed at you that needs external processing. :)"
"It is rather too bad I don't live closer to Boston, as you sound like you could stand to be taken out for dinner and then given a shoulder rub later. But you'll have to find those on your own since I am a bit too far away."
"It's easy to be generous with interpretations when we want people to live up to those interpretations. Though in the aftermath (of my own tendencies for that) I tend to call it 'making excuses'. *laugh*"

"Joy Sadhana is a daily practice in the observation of joy."
-[livejournal.com profile] mylittleredgirl [more info]


Do not be afraid, I am with you
I have called you each by name
Come and follow Me
I will bring you home
I love you and you are mine
     -"You Are Mine" (David Haas)


Five good things about today:
1. Butternut squash ravioli on the pasta bar at work.
2. Having Megan-mjules around (on Y!M) to flail at, repeatedly.
3. De-stressing about something after a few hours of processing (and mostly letting go of my crankiness at another thing).
4. Class is over, so I got to hang around after Rest and Bread service.
4a. Some of the folks at Rest and Bread disliked that people in the crowd booed Bush at the Inauguration yesterday.
4b. Gary said that on Sunday Molly said something about how there are Republicans in the congregation (and so people shouldn't act like h8ers -- or something).
5. Responding to my message about Rev. Lowery and (not) being Methodist, Carolyn said, "Just tell everyone you're Presbymethodgationist!"  Gold star to her for remembering the denominations of all the churches I hang out at :)

Three things I did well today:
1. [gym] ~30min in the weight room (having a good amount of sleep totally makes this a less strained experience!)
2. I sent e-messages to a couple of people (I am really bad at keeping up with correspondence of the letter/email/facebook message sort).
3. I lifted up certain people in the Prayers at church tonight.

Two things I am looking forward to (doing [better]) tomorrow:
["anything that you're looking forward to, that means you're facing tomorrow with joy, not trepidation," as Ari says]
1. CAUMC small group
2. is a cardio morning at the gym

***

Rest and Bread ("Dreams")

Psalm 126
Sacred Text: Langston Hughes' "Harlem" (aka, "what happens to a dream deferred?")
hermionesviolin: (light in the darkness)
People keep saying "Happy New Year," which continues to throw me.  It threw me when people said it at church on Sunday, when the flight crew said it today, and when coworkers said it today -- though today actually makes sense because I haven't seen these people since 2008.

I didn't really wanna go to work this morning, but I went to the gym* (duh), changed into my bright red sparkly button-down shirt and sadly-pocket-less grey slacks, returned my loaner laptop, got some breakfast (I was not gonna pick up milk on my way home last night, so no cereal for me this morning), and booted up my computer.  I'd been keeping an eye on my work email all through the break -- though admittedly ignoring anything that didn't look related to SF -- and by like midafternoon I was in a good, accomplishing, liking my job, mood.  And I only had to tell the story of "the fuckup that ruined Saturday" (though I was more subdued than that in sketching what had happened) a few times.

* gym )

In between work stuff, I messaged various people about plans and felt all excited and happy in that way that the prospect of social interaction makes me in the best of times.

MaryAlice said she'd gotten a Paperwhite and asked, "Is that the same as narcissus?  [off my look]  You don't know, but you'll look it up."  I laughed.  (And she was right.)

Katie had not actually left when I went by her desk at the end of the workday, so we actually got to walk home together.  I can't tell you the last time that happened.  She was gonna come back from Maine the Monday after Christmas but ended up staying through New Year's -- which given how my week played out was actually fine.  But we are maybe having dinner on Friday.  We were both really glad to see each other again, and when we parted she initiated a hug.

I stopped by Alexander's (corner store) on the way home to pick up milk, and they had good bananas, so I picked up some of those as well.

I came home, and my housemate said, "I have good news and bad news.  The good news is that you have a package on the kitchen table; the bad news is that the oil bill came."  (Though the oil bill really wasn't bad.)  I was confused as to why I had a package, and then I picked it up and saw the return address and remembered.

From our chat on Mon, 12/15/08:
mjules (4:57 PM):  Dishes are washed, the rest of the holiday cards are all set up to address and go. (I mailed several today. Yours was not among them because a small package is accompanying yours.)
Elizabeth (4:58 PM):  I get a package? Aww.
mjules (4:58 PM):  Nothing terribly ground breaking, but it reminded me a bit of you. It will likely end up being something that just clutters up your house/desk.
mjules (4:59 PM):  *grin*
Elizabeth (4:59 PM):  *laughs*


The card (and inside message) is beautiful, and the gift is a Books-a-Million Book Lover's 2009 Calendar -- which purpose, according to the package, is providing a book recommendation each day ... so, not useless, and will only clutter up my space temporarily :)

And la bff is safely arrived home.

***

[on the lj-pocalypse] While I dislike the lack of severance pay, I am not actually concerned that this signals the eminent demise of LJ.  Though backups are always a good idea (see here, for example, for various options).

***

I've heard about [livejournal.com profile] saveours00j (mostly from having [livejournal.com profile] yuki_onna on StalkerPin) but hadn't really looked at it.  This evening, my housemate told me they were selling a limited edition anthology (literally, they will stop selling it once expenses are met) with contributions from Neil Gaiman, Francesca Lia Block, and Catherynne M. Valente, among others, and that I should buy one because she'd already donated money and so didn't have the budget to buy one but if I bought one then she could read it after I was done :)  [Comments in the post mention that some of the contributions, like the Gaiman, are reprints, but I still ordered a copy.]  Later, yuki_onna posted about it.  She mentioned that the anthology comes out on s00j's birthday and said, "can you even imagine an anthology for your birthday? One that will heal you and make you whole? I cannot begin. "

***

Gaza can has truce?  Only a proposal right now, so it is arguably the sort of news that isn't, but still.
hermionesviolin: (hipster me)
Change and freedom are both excellent rewards for voting, but so is free ice cream.
-ilanabean42

Also: sex toys.

My state's gonna go blue as far as the Presidential election, so I want to vote 3rd party (that seems so weird to say given that I have 6 parties to choose from), but I'm really not excited about any of them.

I read stuff criticizing Obama, and part of me is really easily swayed.  In part because I really enjoy being contrarian (and I'm surrounded by left of center folk in just about all my spheres), but there's also the fact that I'm so hesitant to commit myself to actually being pro-anything because I'm always so conscious of the (potential) criticisms.  So I'm in my comfort zone when I'm criticizing (or not involved).  I'm some sort of lazy maximizer [Google: maximizer vs. satisficer].

But then I read stuff like [David Post, November 2, 2008 at 10:38am] Why I'll Be Voting for Obama and I feel like, "Yes!" and part of me really does want to be excited about Obama for President.

Andy Bryan (Enter the Rainbow) attended an Obama rally and wrote:
Two moments of the rally were most profound for me.  [...] The second moment was when he was contrasting one of his positions with McCain's position, and the crowd started booing. He kind of cut us off, saying, "You don't need to boo, just go vote." I had read about him saying that before, but to experience it made an impact on me. The crowd did not boo any more after that. By way of comparison and for what it's worth, Governor Palin did not stop the crowd at her rally from booing.
This struck me particularly because on CNN AM I'd seen clips from a McCain rally, and hearing the crowd boo in response to criticisms of Obama really bothered me -- not because it brought to mind accusations of hateful/violent things said by attendees at McCain-Palin rallies, but just because I don't like that emphasis on attacking the opposition (I complained about this during the RNC); and yes I know this sounds dissonant with my critique-stance, but I feel like there's a legitimate difference between "booing" and, y'know, actual critiquing.

liz_marcs linked to this macro from PunditKitchen, which I enjoyed.

from my housemate's flist: Les Misbarack ("One Day More") [YouTube]

***
the earth is a hard place to imagine
if you start from scratch
-from "Black Straw" by Don Domanski
gym )

It's funny, when I'm feeling so tired/unfocused/motivated... I forget that Getting Shit Done really does help me feel better.  (Though I do think I needed the weekend to take a break from work and get some rest.  And I am rly looking forward to going to bed tonight.)

CallunaV recently said:
I suspect it's different for everyone, and my issues =/= your issues and so forth, but I feel like most of us are not so incredibly short-sighted and self-indulgent that we would squander our work time just for the hell of it. It's because we hate the work, or we hate the person we're working for, or we're afraid we can't do it, or we're afraid that doing it will make us feel horrible, or we don't want to face what comes next when it's done, or we're angry that we have to do it in the first place...things that aren't reasonable, so we don't admit them to ourselves a lot of the time, which makes everything more frustrating: why am I playing this solitaire game I don't even like instead of doing what I need to do when A: I know I need to do it, B: I don't actually dislike it, and C: I know I'll feel good when I'm done? Why? Why?
It was really useful to me to have that articulated like that -- because, yeah, there are real reasons I get avoidy, even when I know I'm being irrational.


wtg, DST, it was srsly dark out when I left work.  I kinda like it, though.  Walking across the river with all the lights -- it's... "romantic" has connotations I don't intend, but it makes me think of being downtown or something in winter with all the positive connotations of the Christmas season (stuff like Handel's Messiah).

----

I never did get to finishing last week's update post.

Wed-Sat )
hermionesviolin: (self)
God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother.

-1 John 4:16b-21 (NIV)
***

gym: Thurs/Fri )

***

mjules and I were talking about an assortment of things this morning, and spurred by agreement about the frustration of people not responding to the whole of what you're saying (we were not just talking about last night's VP debate) came this:

[10:12 AM] mjules: We should run for President/VP together. 
[10:12 AM] mjules: You could be President because I am so clearly not an Alpha type. *grin* 
[10:13 AM] me: :) I'm not certain I am either. 
[10:13 AM] mjules: Oh well. Maybe we'll share power.
[10:13 AM] mjules: Hey, they want a real change? Forget P/VP. We'll be Co-Presidents.
[10:14 AM] me: lol
[10:13 AM] mjules: I mean, I think we've got everyone's best interests at heart.
[10:13 AM] mjules: You're Christian, I'm not but I understand it... we're both excellent at thinking inside someone else's head... we're logical and conscientious and detail-oriented... I'm bigender so I've got the male interest thing going on while still being sensitive to women's rights... gay marriage would be de facto as of our first day in office... *laugh*

***

I actually got a CAUMC small group discussion writeup posted, for the first time since *checks* June.
hermionesviolin: (moon house)
Yesterday I was feeling like I'm really kind of over this warm weather (though I was willing to wait until September/after Labor Day to complain, 'cause before that it's still legitimately summer) 'cause being warm and damp when I arrive at the T/gym after walking just doesn't make me happy.  But it got down to almost 50 last night!  I was quite pleased.

gym )

***

After the CNN hype yesterday, I had kind of wanted to watch Michelle Obama's speech last night, but I'm so out of the habit of actually sitting down in front of a tv (fall tv starting is gonna be WEIRD).  Yay Google.  Huffington Post -- summary, video, and text  [and the text of her brother's speech, which preceded hers -- and the CNN transcript of Ted Kennedy's speech]

***

Cailin was saying that she feels like most of our peers don't listen to classical music, and she doesn't actually expect it to die out, but's interested to see what happens.

***

I had coffee with LauraRuth at Mr. Crepe.  Near the end (she had to leave to go have dinner with her girlfriend) she asked if there was an agenda for this meeting or if I'd just wanted to say hi.  I said I'd just wanted to say hi -- and that I'd learned not to have an agenda in mind when having coffee with clergy, that especially the first time I have coffee with clergy it turns out to be a getting-to-know-you thing even when I went into it expecting that we had an agenda for our meeting.

She did actually have a couple agenda items of her own.  One was that she and Keith were gonna be meeting tomorrow to discuss the Rest & Bread service, which they've been doing for 3 (!) months now, and she wanted my input because I'm so thoughtful and considered and because I "think liturgically."  I had to laugh at that one, though I did talk about how I'd learned that actually I am attached to certain ways of doing things (e.g., Benediction = "Now may grace, mercy, and peace, from God the Father, Jesus Christ the Son, and God the Holy Spirit, be and abide with you always.") and as I've been in various churches, I've picked up preferred scripts for different parts of the service.

The second agenda item came out of a conversation.  She asked where I was from, and I told her, and she asked if I'd moved to the city for school and I said no, I went to school out in Western Mass. and she asked where? Amherst? and I said no, Smith, and she smiled, and I laughed and said, "Yeah, I went to a super-queer, ragingly liberal college -- which was awesome -- and came out of it with a hatred for the American Left."

She asked what "pot" I would put myself in if not "progressive" or "liberal."  I said that if forced to pick a political party I pick (small l) libertarian, and that certainly I am aligned with the progressives/liberals on lots of things, but as I often say, I hang out with the liberals because they make me "less uncomfortable" than the conservatives.  She asked me about that and I briefly explained my Smith experience and my issues with "inclusive" churches -- the latter which conversation I had just had with Sean and Carolyn on Sunday night.

She said she asks because they (First Church Somerville) are trying to put together a vision statement that doesn't use the word "progressive" or "liberal."  (Her distance from the term "liberal" is a class thing -- that she hears the word "liberal" and thinks of people who believe that just because they say the right words they've done good in the world, like just by saying you're anti-racist you've done anti-racist work.)  Thinking about it on my way home, it occurred to me that the answer is obvious: just talk about your guiding principles (justice, peace, whatever), with possibly secondarily listing the issues of primary importance.

At one point she asked me how old I was and said I seemed older than 25 (she didn't quite say "old soul" -- which I was glad of, because I think that implies more gravitas and wisdom than I have -- but it was that sort of idea) and I grinned and thanked her.  As we were saying goodbye, she said she really enjoys being around me, which I was kind of touched by.  And I got multiple long hugs :)

***

Had the first of my haul of gelatin-free yogurts tonight.
Whole Soy & Co. Raspberry yogurt = quite acceptable.

***

excerpt from IM conversation with Joe )

***

excerpt from IM conversation with mjules )
hermionesviolin: (friendship)
Her birthday's actually tomorrow, but I'm having my own birthday party tomorrow, so I'm going to be busy, so I'm posting this now.

I timelined us recently, but I like the excuse to do a more thorough one.

I suspect I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of people who will care about this timeline. )

She's a "crazy tree-hugging hippie pagan," and I wouldn't have initially thought we would become close at all, but we totally have. I am so so grateful for her willingness to listen to me talk incessantly and how she is so non-judgmental and how she is willing to believe me (though she doesn't hesitate to tell me when she has a different interpretation of a situation than I do, which I value, she never tries to convince me that I'm wrong and always respects that I'm bringing different things to the situation than she would be). And I love that we can chat easily about so many things, not just the one "topic" that initially brought us together.

So yeah, *celebrates you*
hermionesviolin: (moon house)
I've made a visible dent in my piles of crap, though it's definitely going to be the Project that occupies most all my free time for the next couple of weeks.

(Ergo, people should phone me, since I will be on chat programs even less than usual when I am at home.)

Speaking of phoning . . . Ari called me from the Chicago airport around 8pm Boston time, where she had arrived sans travel mishaps.

P.S. Happy Birthday, [livejournal.com profile] maechi.

Due to recent conversations, I find myself checking the craigslist personals.  I have sucked mjules in as well, and tonight she said, "The sad part is, you and I would probably answer each other's ad.  *giggle*"
hermionesviolin: (self)
Today I:
+ went downtown to Payless and picked up a pair of dress flats and a pair of cute-but-not-excessively-so wedge sandals for clubbing or whatever
+ went to TJMaxx and on a whim picked up a bright spring shirt which turned out to look great on me, and also a pair of brown dress pants which fit fairly well
+ did laundry
+ washed dishes
+ picked up some groceries
+ cleaned my room a bit, though not nearly as much as I should (being ruthless is HARD)

Stuff I'm getting rid of that flisters might actually want:
- green dolphin earrings (surgical steel posts) claimed by Maria
- magnet of an indigenous peoples male-female couple with the text "Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.  1 Corinthians 13:7-8"
- magnet with "Discover the wonder in every day" text above a wilderness scene with mountains in the image of bears, rocks in the image of eagle heads, a waterfall, etc.

I need to figure out what I am feeding people next Saturday.
Edit: I am also somewhat concerned that almost everyone is gonna drive and there is like nowhere to park. /edit

P.S. From QueerAgenda:
Wednesday, July 16
============

Gender Redesigner
At Brattle Theater:
40 Brattle Street Harvard Sq. Cambridge
9:30pm all ages $10
http://www.truthserum.org

CineMental is excited to welcome fAe Gibson, subject of Gender Redesigner, to Boston for this screening and discussion.

Gender Redesigner Johnny Bergmann, USA, 2006, Video, 74 min.

Follow fAe over the course of 5 years as she begins to question her gender and decides to surgically modify her body. This intimate fun filled adventure makes you wonder how fAe can handle beginning hormone treatment, having his breasts removed, and drag kinging - all in the middle of rural Western Pennsylvania. While transitioning from female to male, fAe makes a startling discovery about the balance between his masculine and feminine sides. Can she succeed living as a man in the middle of farm country?

Gender Redesigner has screened at: NYC NewFest, San Francisco Frameline Festival, North Carolina Film Fest, Translations: Seattle Transgender Film Festival, and the Best of NewFest @ BAM and other festivals.

fore more information: http://www.myspace.com/genderredesignerfilm and http://www.RainbowAmerica.org
***

For the baby shower, I bought Trelawney and Eric (and baby-to-be Cuboo) a BornFree Gift Set of Bisphenol-A Free Plastic bottles from their registry.  I got an e-card thank you today.
Thank you, Elizabeth!

I got the bottles in the mail, and I am very excited to use them! They look delicious! And I'm especially excited to see how fast I can make Mummy and Daddy get them ready for me in the middle of the night when they're still half asleep and I'm making lots of loud noise! We'll have lots of fun! Thank you so much!!

love and kisses (with drool),
Cuboo
***

Edit: Chatting with mjules tonight, she related a conversation with her mom in which said mom said, "Damn skippy."

me: ::laughs:: I haven't heard anyone say "damn skippy" in years I don't think.
mjules: *laughs* It's fairly commonplace with me and Mom. We both have kind of quirky speech patterns.
me: I recall "nifterspiffic" from my teen years with my best friend, but that's fallen by the wayside.
I love that my parents adopt my slang -- like my mom will say "wootles" (her variant on "woot").
mjules: Wootles? That's fucking adorable.
me: Yeah, my mom's pretty adorable
mjules: Hee. From what I know of her so far, I'm willing to accept her nomination into the Hall Of Most Awesomest Mothers Ever, along with my own mother
hermionesviolin: (self)
but you've got the hard cough of a chain smoker
and you're at the arctic circle playing strip poker
and it's getting colder and colder
everytime you lose

so go ahead
make your next bold move
tell us
what's the next thing you're gonna need to prove
to yourself
I got my hair cut last night (Salon CU, Christine).  The woman styled it with an out-flip rather than the under-flip I usually do, and yeah, I don't really like that look on me.  Which is good to know.  (I'm really happy with the cut, though.  The layering is all intact, so it's just as pretty as it was before, only now it's not at that awkward length, which makes it even prettier.)

I went to bed around 11 last night.  I kept seeing flashes of light -- heat lightning I supposed.  Around midnight, it got really windy -- I actually took out my window fan for fear it would get blown out of the window.  This was also when the air significantly cooled off.  I was still not falling asleep, though.  Not awake enough to anything terribly productive (I know, this is different from my regular awake times how?), just not actually sleeping.  Hi, 2:30am.  I woke up at 7:37am.  (I aim to be out of my house around 7:15.)  So that's the second day this year that I flat-out did not go to the gym ('cause I already had evening commitments, so I couldn't do it after work).

***

I Y!M chatted with mjules this afternoon, and she is ftw.  (And message to mjules: I did feel better afterward -- apparently I still need to be reminded that talking things out, even when it is just an endless rehash, makes me feel better, and that trying to just will feelings to go away really doesn't work for me like at all ever.)

From our conversation:
me: I always appreciate clarifications, even when they turn out to be redundant.
mjules: I fucking love clarifications.
mjules: Love them so much I'm going to put them in the pre-dating clause I make my next S.O. sign.
mjules: *grins* I'm mostly joking about that, of course, but I'm starting to think it wouldn't be a bad idea. I'm really tired of having relationships not turn out.
[...]
mjules: Once you got to the point that you felt you wanted to try a dating relationship with someone, you could pull out the paperwork, say 'Here, these are things you need to know,' and if they run screaming, you know they aren't prepared to deal with your analytical nature. *laughs*
me: Exactly!
mjules: Maybe we should draw up some drafts.
mjules: ...God, I can see us making spreadsheets.

She began drafting and in response to one of my comments, she said: "*laugh* I like that you appreciate phrasing. That was always my favorite part of your feedback, back when you just read my fic, that you would pick apart sentence structure."

Whee, memory lane!

I ended up reminding her that I'd recced her and she reminded me that when I contacted her to tell her some of her fic links didn't work (she'd locked down her personal journal and reposted fic to a fic journal but had missed a few . . . and I was at the time copying all my recs over onto del.icio.us) she checked out my journal and saw my CWM writeups and suchlike and she was in the midst of making peace with her own queerness and Christian upbringing and yeah, she totally friended me.

[In the spirit of Ari, I tracked down the exact date she friended me -- June 7, 2007.  Which it didn't occur to me until just now that that was barely a year ago.  And we didn't really start becoming close until I was on Y!M all the time this January.]

Anyway, in talking about her fic, mjules mentioned how she's "a hopelessly cynical romantic" and told me about a story idea which reminded me of [livejournal.com profile] musesfool's fondness for characters saying "I love you" in ways other than actually saying those exact words.  And so of course what always comes to mind for me is "I wouldn't stop for red lights."  So I tracked down the "17 People" transcript. for my own reference more than anything, I guess )
hermionesviolin: (self)
gym: Wed.-Fri. )

***

I feel like I've been on summer vacation since Wednesday.

Friday was the now traditional "Light Lunch" followed by an afternoon off.  Peter and Greg walked over to lunch with us.  I picked up a small whoopie pie for dessert, and Nicki was asking me what the filling was, like was it flavored, and I was like, "Um, it's a whoopie pie... it's just cream."  Katie reminded me that we'd had a conversation before about how whoopie pies are a New England thing.  (Greg didn't know what they were, but we're used to that 'cause he spent a good chunk of time in Israel.)

Cate joined later, and some I ended up telling her about due South fandom.  I don't think I'd really realized before that CKR was in due South and that's where everyone initially knows him from.  (Yes, apparently I think of The Canadian Actor Mafia as its own fandom.)  I've never seen due South, but I was recalling that I did sporadically watch some tv show with Mounties when I was younger, and really, how many tv shows about Mounties aired on broadcast American tv in the 1990s?  Dad, do you remember anything about this?

Speaking of fandoms I'm not in...
via [livejournal.com profile] monkeycrackmary: Steph in Africa (on scans_daily)

Anyway, we hung out for a couple hours and then went our separate ways.  I did a couple errands -- though not as many as I should have.  We reconvened for dinner at CPK at the Pru.  Cate was running late, but we still had our food (I got the mushroom pizza.) with enough time to eat and not feel rushed.  (We ended up getting to Park St. like right at 7:30 -- minor T delays was something of a theme with me that afternoon -- but ASP never starts on time, so we were okay.)

That morning, I bumped into Layna on my way to the T and Allie at the T, and on the Green Line to Prudential I saw Meredith.

***

ASP's 4th season wrapped up with King John, which neither Cate nor I had ever seen/read before.  (And I didn't look at the synposis, opting to just go with the flow of the play)

Turns out it was really good.  Both the play and the production.  It was very modern -- people in suits, drinking martinis, brandishing pistols, etc. -- and that made SO MUCH SENSE.  And the play itself is interesting and engaging (and okay there were a few bits I could have done without, but that's usually true of me and lots of the comedic bits Shakespeare sticks in the histories).  I told Cate afterward that it was probably my favorite of the season, definitely made me excited about giving them money for my subscription for next year.  She commented that the other productions this year had schticks, like the all-female Macbeth, the Henry V with only five actors, and she was like, "See, when you have a multi-gender cast of more than half a dozen, you can do great things."  I commented that while this one also had a "schtick" (the contemporary, shades of mafioso, setting) it was more of a theme -- we agreed that this was like Titus, which was the play we saw last season and which was also awesome.  I also said that they didn't overdo it, which she agreed, and she commented that ironically, she thought if they'd done more with the schtick in their production of Tempest this season it might well have worked a lot better for her.

spoilers )

***

As I expected, I had mixed feelings about the apartment I looked at this morning.  It's a two-level two-bedroom condo.  The woman living there is looking for someone quiet, and part of me is like, "I'm never home, and when I am I'm mostly just playing on the internet," but part of me worries that I would be on edge, worrying.  The two bedrooms abut each other, and she mentioned that for example, "If I make a late-night phone call I go downstairs" (the upper level is the two bedrooms and a full bath, the lower level is a living room and eat-in kitchen and half-bath) and yeah, that kind of quiet consideration feels maybe excessive.

It's got a nice basement I could use to store some of my boxes (though yes I know I should purge before I move) plus washer-dryer.  She has RCN wireless internet; I would need wired Internet and would like cable tv.  The bedroom is good-sized (11x14... my current one is about 11x11) and with a good-sized closet.

There's a nice little playground across the street, including checkerboard tables with attached seats.  It's something like a 15-minute walk to Harvard Square, and I could pick up the 86 (direct to my campus) like five minutes from the house.  It's near a Market Basket, plus the FoodMaster by Inman and the Union Square Farmer's Market and it's a 5-10min. walk to the 87 to Porter (Shaw's).

She rents from the absentee landlords (they're in California, but apparently there's a local repairperson who's good... and the condo was built in the 1980s and is in good shape) and was talking about a month-to-month lease, which makes me nervous, though it also provides flexibility should I decide it wasn't working out and wanted to move (and I do trust that if she decided to move -- she's been flirting with the idea of buying a place herself, but doesn't think that'll happen any time soon -- she would give me plenty of notice).

I'm not under pressure to decide SOON, which I appreciate.

Part of me feels like I should just wait until July, when the bulk of the August 1 openings will be posted.  And part of me thinks I should actually check out July 1 openings 'cause if there's something that's a great fit then it would be worth double-paying rent for a month.

***

I went to Gusti's graduation party (at the Nave Gallery at CHPC).  The official start time was 4:30, so I left my house at 4:30.  (I live about a five-minute walk away.)  It was really nice that so many of Gusti's communities were there (people from her neighborhood, people from CHPC, people from school -- including her undergrad [she just graduated from HDS]).  I actually chatted with people I didn't already know.  *proud of me*

SarahD. was talking about Adam Sandler's new movie (the Zohan one), which apparently includes Israel-Palestine issues.  I now feel like I need to see this movie.  (She also mentioned how she walked out of Michael Moore's Fahrenheit 9/11.  I was so pleased.)

***

I was chatting with mjules after I got home, and it's good to have someone who knows what you're talking about when you wtf at "The Devil Is Bad" by the W's (Track 8 on Disc 1 of WOW 1999 The Year's Top Christian Artists and Songs).

Track 12 is the Supertones' "Little Man," which brought me back to the Supertones concert Tim took us to back when I was in high school, which I had totally forgotten about until now.

***

I was okay in the heat today, and my apartment still feels decent.  I am very pleased by this.  (Though I expect it will get worse as the days continue to high near 90F and it only cools off to like 70F overnight.)
hermionesviolin: (hipster me)
I seem to always forget that there are lyrics in between the first and last lines of this chorus.
Oh, my love, I have been betrayed
by the thoughts I think,
by the words I say
Oh, my love, I have been deceived
by the war raging inside of me.
What is up with my feeling queasy like every morning recently?  Today I didn't eat anything until after I went to the gym -- at which point I (slowly) ate a blueberry bagel -- and yet I was still feeling queasy come lunchtime.  (Last week it would go away by the time I'd walked to the T in the morning.)  I got french fries and a banana for lunch -- and then bumped into Nicki, who wasn't feeling well either and was going to get fro-yo, which idea I decided to adopt as well.
    Lack of sleep + emotional stress = ftw.  (mjules said, "I hope everything turns out as okay as it can, and in the meantime I wish you peace."  Exactly.)  And no, I don't want to talk about it.  I'll be fine, it's just a sucky situation which nothing can really be done about.

I'm not good at keeping secrets.  I only share with people I trust are safe (and I don't think my trust has been misplaced yet), but that is not necessarily everyone else's expectation when they trust me with things.  This is probably something I should work on.

In better news, Prof.B's MiddleEast trip seems to be fine.  (Multiple cooks in the kitchen and all, so I worried that stuff had gotten dropped, but we seem okay.)  And today wasn't wholly unproductive.  (I did work stuff and also did my writeup of The Curiosity of Chance.  I private-posted a placeholder entry last night, but it's public now that it's finished.)

I was up so so late last night.  I would have crashed sooner tonight, but tonight was the HIMYM season finale (this week will likely be slow enough that I could easily watch it streaming online, but I like watching stuff right when it airs anyway).

***

gym )

***

On CNN this morning, Ed Rollins, Republican strategist, said that Bush's talk about appeasement at the Knesset was a bad idea, and that Obama used it well -- pushed Hillary's WVa win off the front page.  I hadn't thought of it that way before.
    John Roberts asked him about Tom Davis' statements about the Republican party (link via jennyo), and he basically said he agreed.  I'm so used to this sense of the Republican party as a dominant force, that it's sort of weird to hear major GOP people saying this stuff.

***

[livejournal.com profile] the_red_shoes talked about "Wilde writing REALLY WEIRDLY about Jesus" and she then posted:
His miracles seem to me as exquisite as the coming of Spring, and quite as natural. I see no difficulty at all in believing that such was the charm of his personality that his mere presence could bring peace to souls in anguish, and that those who touched his garments or his hands forgot their pain: or that as he passed by on the highway of life people who had seen nothing of life's mysteries saw them clearly, and others who had been deaf to every voice but that of Pleasure heard for the first time the voice of Love and found it as "musical as is Apollo's lute": or that evil passions fled at his approach, and men whose dull imaginative lives had been but a mode of death rose as it were from the grave when he called them: or that when he taught on the hillside the multitude forgot their hunger and thirst and the cares of this world, and that to his friends who listened to him as he sat at meat the coarse food seemed delicate, and the water had the taste of good wine, and the whole house became full of the odour and sweetness of nard.
Is it bad that I'm really quite fond of that?  (I've never read De Profundis, so all I'm saying is that I like that excerpt.)

***

I have no real interest in seeing the Prince Caspian movie, though I've been reading other people's reviews of it (thus far, Sharon hated it, Mari and Carolyn loved it).  I saw a review on friendsfriends (kben) which I enjoyed: Read more... )

I've been reading posts about Supernatural (a show I saw a minute or two of once and which fandom I only peripherally follow) recently -- the ones responding to [livejournal.com profile] trollprincess' "Bitchwach" posts about the use of certain gendered insults in the three seasons of the show.
The argument that resonates with me most is the frustration that it's expected that this behavior is just "boys being boys."  [livejournal.com profile] cereta wrote:
I mean, seriously, is this it? Do we expect so little of men? This, by the way, is an area where I think men who get it should be really pissed off. God, if society expected nothing better of me than to be an overgrown kid who casually threw around derogatory words for people different from me, I'd be pissed off all the time. But seriously: are we never going to say, "No, this isn't acceptable. No, you don't get to behave like this and not get called on it. No, you shouldn't do this, and if you do it, I'm going to choose not to be around you."?
([livejournal.com profile] veejane talks about masculinity and social class.  I hadn't seen people attributing the misogynistic language to the characters' working class background, but as I said, I'm not actually in this fandom at all, and it's definitely a connection I can easily plausibly see people making -- and honestly probably one I've fallen into myself in other contexts.)
hermionesviolin: (hipster me)
REMINDER: Daylight Saving Time begins at 2am (here in the U.S.).  Which, okay, is really soon, so I hope most of you already knew that.

***

Today's Lenten Labyrinth meditation says: "It's not enough to remove the darkness of the desire for what is harmful.  Once you've [...] cleansed yourself of evil, you must fill yourself with light, which is to say justice, peace and love."  Earlier it had talked about Luke 11:24-26 where Jesus says that someone has an evil spirit cast out of them and the spirit comes back with more evil spirits, so the person's end lot is worse than before the purgation.

***

I woke up before 9:30 this morning, which confused me, 'cause you saw the timestamp on my before-bed post.  But I felt awake enough to get up, so I did.

Megan and I had a late brunch at Renee's.  I got one of the specials -- Eggs Benedict (which I'd never had before) with mushrooms, artichoke hearts, and peppers.  I think I don't like Eggs Benedict that much.  And the hot chocolate was mediocre.  Oh well.  Last time I was there I had a Greek omelet and an orange juice, which was fine.

By the time we finished, it was raining out (like fairly heavily, and with mini-rivers frequent along the roads and sidewalks), so we just came home, changed out of our wet shoes and pants and into dry pajama pants and hung out.  We mostly discussed interpersonal stuff, but there was a detour to [livejournal.com profile] cat_macros, and I played a bunch of music for her 'cause she was unfamiliar with Ani DiFranco, Dar Williams, Jeffrey Foucault, etc.

We had a late dinner -- Barilla ricotta & spinach tortellini and watched Latter Days.  It's got a few plotholes, but mostly just the usual kind of stuff you don't pay too much attention to.  I enjoyed the movie.  I really liked the analogy of life being like the dots that make up the comics printed in newspapers -- that we're too close to make sense of it, but from God's perspective it does all make sense.

mjules: "If it weren't for the gutter, my brain would be homeless"

I only skimmed my flist, which I expect will continue to be the case for some time as Megan's here until Monday evening.




"Joy Sadhana is a daily practice in the observation of joy."
-[livejournal.com profile] mylittleredgirl [more info]

"Sin is necessary, but all will be well, and all will be well, and every kind of thing will be well."
-Julian of Norwich, Showings

Five good things about today:
1. Further talking out some things.
2. Sharing music.
3. I got to lay (is that correct, [livejournal.com profile] thistlerose?) lie on Megan while watching the movie.
4. There were lots of quite enjoyable bits in the movie.
5. Chatting with Megan generally being so easy and comfortable.  (It occurs to me that I have a really good track record with meatspace meetings of people I previously only knew from online and often not for especially long periods of time -- like usually in the ballpark of a year.)
Bonus: A member of the household other than myself bought toilet paper.

Three things I did well today:
1. I thought to bring an umbrella to brunch even though it wasn't yet raining when we left the house.
2. I made dinner.
3. I washed dishes.

Two things I am looking forward to (doing [better]) tomorrow:
["anything that you're looking forward to, that means you're facing tomorrow with joy, not trepidation" -Ari]
1. Bringing Megan to gay church.
2. Hopefully seeing Rachel at morning church.
hermionesviolin: (i walk a lonely road)
[livejournal.com profile] callunav has the Dar Williams line "I'm resolved to being born and so resigned to bravery" as the subtitle of her LJ, and so I often have it stuck in my head.  I have trouble remembering what the rest of the song is, though, so I finally Googled it.  I was right that it's from "Spring Street" and was struck at what the verse that follows it is:
Yeah the one who leaves this also grieves this
Too much rain on a prairie flood plain
Houses floating, love is like that
We built on the river
I told a friend last night that I'm currently in a pissy phase (we both, independently, thought "it's like grieving").  I know that my focus should be on what we're doing going forward, but understanding things is important to me, so when I get thrown something that doesn't fit with the understanding I've developed I get sort of stuck.  Later this evening I was feeling more at peace about moving forward -- I think in part because I feel some vague sense of having made it parse.  But we'll see.  I've been choosing to look at my non-relationships as learning experiences so that when I have a real relationship I'll be better equipped.




"Joy Sadhana is a daily practice in the observation of joy."
-[livejournal.com profile] mylittleredgirl [more info]

"Sin is necessary, but all will be well, and all will be well, and every kind of thing will be well."
-Julian of Norwich, Showings

Five good things about today:
1. I think I'm progressing toward not-sick.
2. mjules, after exchanging cell phone numbers: "OK, any guidelines for cell phone usage? IE, limits on texting, times of day when it's bad to call, etc.?"  I was not expecting that at all and was so delighted.  Yeah, I'm a big fan of thoroughness and forethought and contingency-planning and all that sort of stuff.
3. At post-CWM fellowship, I sat with Kirk and Liz, so I got to learn/practice/review ASL some.
4. Sean told me I got butch points for helping him move a table :)  (I often joke with him about gender roles etc.)
5. I enjoyed the "bitch is the new black" Tina Fey SNL skit.  (Nuns!)  I also enjoyed the Huckabee sketch.

Three things I did well today:
1. I got up at a reasonable hour.
2. I noticed that our front door mats were covered in de-icing stuff such that wiping your boots on them wasn't really helpful, so I brushed them off and also swept the front porch and the interior stairs.
3. I finished reading Ian's job market paper.

Two things I am looking forward to (doing [better]) tomorrow:
1. The Sarah Connor Chronicles
2. Being even less sick.

***

I was walking home from evening church at like quarter past eight, and I'm walking along Powderhouse, and I hear this guy call, "Do you need a ride?" and I look across the street, and there's this guy parked in a dark jeep or something and there doesn't appear to be anyone else around whom he might have been talking to, and I say, "No, thanks," and keep walking, trying not to feel too nervous.

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hermionesviolin: an image of Alyson Hannigan (who plays Willow Rosenberg) with animated text "you think you know / what you are / what's to come / you haven't even / BEGUN" (Default)
Elizabeth (the delinquent, ecumenical)

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