hermionesviolin | Thanksgiving, LJ Affirmations

Current Music: The New Pornographers

Entry tags:

Thanksgiving, LJ Affirmations

Thanksgiving in my family is just my parents, me and my brother, and my maternal grandmother. (My paternal grandparents used to drive up from Maryland, but they're not up for it anymore.) I was thinking early on this Thursday that it would be much more meaningful to me to have a celebration with lots of friends, but then I was thinking that while that might be a lot more fun, it wouldn't necessarily be any more meaningful. When I skimmed the flist Thursday night, I saw lots of posts of gratitude (in list form or more general sentiments), and I think one of my big annoyances about Thanksgiving is that there's no real emphasis on the supposed main point of the holiday. [Obviously y'all were observing it, but I don't generally get the sense that it's central to most people's/families' observances of the holiday.]

The food has never pinged me (even when I ate dead bird, turkey didn't excite me) and I dislike the fact that the holiday seems to be about all Americans eating nearly the exact same foods. Oh, and it's also About the Parade and the Football -- neither of which grab me.

[On a positive note: There was color on my plate. Baby spinach, green beans with almonds, baby carrots, and mashed potatoes. It occurred to me this time around that I basically just avoid the cranberries on principle, so I tried a smidge. Basically what one would expect given cranberry juice -- a connection I should have thought of earlier. The kind of taste that it is doesn't seem to me to really fit in with the rest of the traditional dinner, though.]

Greg [HBS prof] said he was gonna go out to dinner with his family Thanksgiving night -- you don't have to cook or clean up and you're only stuck with your family for a few hours.

***

Last week I mentioned doing LJ Affirmations for Thanksgiving.

I have not included my entire flist here, and if you're not included it doesn't mean that I don't like you. I mean, dude, I have 100+ people friended (even when we take out duplicate journals).

antheia - You deal with so much shit and just keep rolling.

applejuicegirl - I want to Affirm your genuineness. You're not always sure of yourself/things, and you don't try to hide that.

bella_loki - I love you so much, my glittery femmey down-in-the-dirt gardening car-fixing atheist Milton-loving gay superhero comics aficionado.

boob_duck - I want to Affirm that you never make me feel stupid or inferior despite the fact that you are so much more well-read than I am and I almost always feel like you're far smarter than I am.

ff_shiprecs - Dude, you shared in my desire for Sam/Elena femslash; what more do I need to say?

fiareynne - You were so obviously having so much fun dancing at the WriterCon cocktail party. I admire that ability to let go of inhibitions.

immortalavalamp - I can tell you anything and I don't feel judged. Also: cuddling.

itsabigrock - I wanted to Affirm your initiative-taking. At WriterCon you would just round up people and head out places (be it "blue drinks and dancing girls" or just going out to eat somewhere), and now you're making all sorts of changes in your personal life.

laynamarya - As I said, "light in the darkness" is such a fitting name-meaning for you to have. You are so positive and filled with love.

likeadeuce - You have such fun, interesting, and intelligent thoughts about X-Men. I also want to Affirm your Jossverse RPS :)

lilithchilde - Remember when we talked about doing a Special Studies solving the problems of the world by dialoguing with each other? We had such amazing conversations, and I miss that. Also, you've definitely affected the way I think about a lot of things.

lone_wandering - You remain the most honest, earnest person I know, but you've also grown up so much in the time I've known you. Also, I feel honored that you trust me as much as you do.

moxiemuse - I admire your writing, your courage, and your honesty.

musesfool - I really enjoy reading your fic as well as your non-fic entries, and I've also gotten into some great music thanks to you.

offbalance - You're so secure -- in who you are, in what you want, in what you like. I really admire that.

sexonastick - You are so solid. I'm not sure quite how to articulate this, but that's the dominant sense I get of you from your LJ entries (both structure and content thereof).

sk8eeyore - I want to Affirm your putting yourself out there, pushing the boundaries of your comfort zone in the knowledge that it will make you a better stronger person; and also your willingness to reevaluate your thoughts/beliefs/approaches (I'm thinking of your faith journey).

speacechilde - I have always thought you were very intelligent, and I really admire your ability to persevere through really difficult situations and to (as far as I can see) not dissolve in panic etc. (as control-freak me probably would do).

theatre_pixie - I want to Affirm your willingness to be honest even when you suspect yours won't be a popular opinion.

trekgirl55 - I still have your voicemail saved on my phone from WriterCon. I love the straightforwardness of it.

trijinx - You are so unabashed in your love for the things you love. And despite my initial resistances, I often end up really enjoying new things thanks to your tugging.

va_savoir - You are so enthusiastic about the things you love (Science Museum exhibits, etc.) and I really admire that unapologeticness. I was also really impressed that we so easily chatted for so long at Qdoba that afternoon despite not having talked much before.

willysunny - The "sunny" part of your username is so accurate and I always think of you as so light-filled.

wisdomeagle - I want to Affirm your thoughtfulness about your relationships, and also your commitment to finding joy in everyday life. And your fic-writing; your voices are almost always spot-on, and you do marvelous things with language and make them seem effortless.

zzrg - You have done an incredible amount of pushing through difficult situations and making self-improvements, with a dedication I definitely don't think I have.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Thank you so much!

I was really disappointed by the lack of giving thanks at our Thanksgiving. (Along with many other changes from previous years), there was hardly a grace to speak of, just my aunt saying basically "bless you, bless you, bless you, let's eat." I too really enjoyed seeing all the gratitude-lists on the flist, though.

The kind of taste that it is doesn't seem to me to really fit in with the rest of the traditional dinner, though.

I feel like the cranberries provide an appropriate balance of flavors -- something sweet/sour in with all those savories.

And also, *heart*.

I think we usually just do the basic grace; this was just the first time I was feeling whingy intentionality issues around the holiday (spurred by various other factors making me feel less than excited about the holiday).

I feel like the cranberries provide an appropriate balance of flavors -- something sweet/sour in with all those savories.

I almost said something in my LJ entry about how this was probably largely a function of my lack of interest in a multiplicity of flavors in any given meal :)

♥

*blushes* Many thanks for your kind words. I knew when I began actively reading your journal that you and I could--and probably would--butt heads. And at first I kept my mouth shut when we didn't agree because my initial reaction is to get defensive and/or loud about my beliefs/opinions. I eventually learned--through your encouragement--to state my own thoughts on matters even when I knew that they would go against the grain. Thank you for allowing me to do so.
You should know that being able to have an honest, calm, and peaceful discourse here is training for such things in meat-space. Again, thank you.

Thank you for the fics you've written and/or archived. I have several friends with an interest in fiction with an erotic bent and I often point them in your direction (mostly because I have read and enjoyed so many of your stories myself). I would also very much like to thank you for your encouragement of my own excursions into writing. I have yet to complete a fan-fic, but I am often inspired by your work when I write stories for my friends.

Wow, thank you so much for your words. I wasn't expecting such a reciprocal Affirmation when I posted -- though I'm hardly turning it down.

I feel so honored to have had such a strong positive effect on you. (And am also flattered re: my fic.)

I consider my RPS & meta affirmed, thanks!

Aw, gee.

Yes, I remember that! I still say it would have worked. ;) And I miss that too, and you, so very much. Our conversations have always been uniquely stimulating and so very difficult to carry out when we're not so much in each others' lives.

After a couple weeks ago, though . . . it's good to know that we can pick it up again. There will be more visiting, at some point. ^^

you've definitely affected the way I think about a lot of things.
Likewise, quite a bit.

And, d'oh, thank you. Much, much love.

I figured the "thank you" was implied in your lovely reply comment :)

"uniquely stimulating"? I'm flattered. And I know you said it during my visit, but I'm still so pleased that I've affected the way you think about a lot of things as well.

::hugs you from afar::

You're so sweet!

I miss being the social director so I've kind of taken over that role at work and managed to get us out doing things together a lot more often. Of course I really miss the outings that end with me having people in my bed and lots of kissing, but you know...baby steps. LOL.

Miss you!

Good for you getting your workpeople socializing.

I meant to also Affirm your willingness to open up what you have to people -- i.e., letting me sleep in your bed nonsexually :)

::loves on being missed::

(deleted comment)

Admittedly I often tend to save voicemails from my friends both because they're often entertaining and because I like hearing their voices. Yours has the added bonus of reminding me of WriterCon :)

Thank you so much for the reciprocal Affirmation. I really appreciate it.

I was really glad to meet you as well.

That's so neat that your family does Affirmations of a sort at Thanksgiving.

It's definitely hard when you're used to doing things a certain way and then you're somewhere where they do things so differently.

I am actually a fan of going around the table and giving thanks for whatever we are thankful for. I had meant to do that ... but I think my mind checked somewhere on the Mass Pike Wednesday.

Do we normally do that? (It's entirely possible I have no memory, of course.)

not exactly. I think we did it more before we had the Sweenys join us -- I seem to remember it as a longer ago tradition. But it's one I like and was hoping to re-ignite this year. Maybe next year you can be in charge of remembering to give thanks :)

Thanks. It's good to know that the "putting myself out there" isn't mainly wishful thinking in my own head and is actually evident to others. And it's interesting to me that reevaluating my beliefs is something you'd associate with me, since over the past year I've worried sometimes that I come across to people as off-putting and reactionary -- but now that I think about it, I can see that I've been "reevaluating" in the direction of reclaiming a lot of things that were valuable to me before I encountered more liberal views at Hollins, and at the same time my leanings about church have been a constant process of rethinking and adjustment. So I can see how it applies, even though I often find myself longing for stability and a deeply rooted sense of identity in my faith.

Certainly there's more you *could* be doing to "put yourself out there," but it's tough to discern how much pushing of one's boundaries is healthy and what's gonna lead to nervous breakdown. Obviously my understanding of your time at Yale is filtered by how you choose to present it on LJ, but I do think it's not just wishful thinking on your part.

I don't interpret you as reactionary. You sometimes do the twitchy reacting against things that I do (though what I twitch against and what you twitch against are usually different), but to me "reactionary" implies a thoughtlessness, and your reactions are strongly rooted in having thought a lot about things.

Hey, reevaluating is not mutually exclusive from longing for stability and rootedness. You've said yourself any number of times that you believe/value things (theology, liturgy, etc.) now that you never would have imagined doing so years ago.

I'm flattered by my inclusion in your affirmations. I always wonder if I'm actually fooling anyone with my pretending to be all growed up.
;p

As for affirmations, I'm so impressed by the amount of care and thought you give to, have for people & things.
Particularly because I'm the sort of person who forgets to eat for days, and so I'd feel really bad for anyone who depended on me for anything beyond the occasional conversation.

Happy holidays.

Count me in as another person flattered to be included. (Though, I feel vaguely guilty that I haven't posted at

ff_shiprecs for months.) Yes, the world needs more Sam/Elena (or any, any would be good).

For myself, I love your honest documentation of your spiritual journey. And your detailed, squeeful posts about so many different television shows. You strike me as a very genuine person. And I really wish I'd gotten a chance to meet you at

writercon.

Have a good week.

I wrote two Sam/Elena ficlets for the Fireworks femslash porn battle, though I'm not sure any of my other self-indulgent ideas with them will ever make it into print.

I haven't had time to read fic in months, so you get no guilt from me :) I am glad to see you're still around LJ, though.

Aww, thank you for the reciprocal affirmation. That's very kind of you, plus I'm always glad to hear that people appreciate the stuff I write.

You were at

writercon? How did I not know that? We totally should have hooked up. WriterCon '08, baby!

Well, I was at

writercon under my real lj name. But, yes, we should totally have hooked up, and I will definitely be going to '08. It's such a blast.

Fie on you hiding your secret identity from me :P

Ah, but what if I'm someone in fandom you think is annoying? Imagine the awkward. You know if I tell you then you're going to feel obligated to friend me back.

It's not just you, though, I haven't told anyone. Not that anyone's ever asked.

When you first mentioned WaT writers to me and I noted they weren't on your flist I knew you must have another LJ (which made sense since this one is a fandom-specific recs journal) but if you weren't gonna volunteer it I wasn't gonna press.

You are very patient and respectful with my silliness, thank you.

To be honest, I don't talk about WaT much on my main lj either. In any case, hello! I'm

inalasahl. *shakes hand* It's a pleasure to meet you.

I actually wasn't interpreting it as silliness -- am just used to people compartmentalizing and keeping fannish identities private etc. (though obviously it's not how I function). But you're welcome.

Ah, so you have me friended on both journals :) Pleased to meet you(r merged identity). ::shakes hand::

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Thanksgiving, LJ Affirmations

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

giving thanks

Re: giving thanks

Re: giving thanks

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject