hermionesviolin | in which I have Santa issues

Quote from Thursday's episode of Without a Trace. Santa images from vintage advertisements. I prefer the second icon because the point is not that Santa is a God stand-in who is accusing you of being on the Bad List (which is what I feel like the first icon is implying) but rather that Santa is a lie. And really, neither of these icons gets that across sufficiently, but I haven't figured out a way to get across what I want in icon format.

[For those of you just tuning in: I have serious issues with lying to your children and hate the commercialization/secularization of Xmas anyhow.] And yes I know, spirit of giving and all that, lots of people have fond magical memories of Santa, etc. etc. I am restraining myself from demanding that everyone drop the Santa thing and have an appropriately spiritual observance (or observe Consumalata instead) and people are welcome to discuss in the comments or in personal e-mail, though I'm not likely to change my mind on the issue.

If you wish to raise your children with the story of St. Nicholas and do Christmas stockings and participate in things like Toys for Tots and Angel Tree, explaining all the while that we do these things in the spirit of St. Nicholas/Jesus Christ/the 3 Wise Men/whomever, then I am full of encouragement -- though okay, upon consideration, it still bugs me a little bit, because the idea of setting aside specific dates for gift-giving bothers me; but I am so all about intentionality, so if you are being thoughtful about what you're doing I'll probably be okay. But handing your children presents with tags saying "from Santa" and encouraging them to leave out cookies and milk for a red-suited man . . . that makes me homicidal.

[A post more receptive to fond Santa memories is here.]

1:50am -- Edited a whole bunch of times and now I'm going to bed.

Sunday at 12:42pm: Edited to add my personal Santa background:

My parents absolutely hate lying to their children, so they were always wishy-washy around the issue of Santa Claus. All of our presents had the giver's name on them, and we knew Mommy filled our stockings (since the bulk of it was baked goods we'd been watching her make for the past month). Once my grandma gave us placemats with a "from Santa" tag on the wrapping, but basically as soon as we opened them she said they were from her. I really wanted there to be a Santa Claus for the kids whose parents couldn't afford to buy them presents but saw no need for Santa Claus to come to my house. I don't remember any specific moment of knowing Santa wasn't real, but I suspected quite early.

I know most people grow out of the Santa belief non-traumatically, but it feels to me like you're setting yourself/your kid up for such potential trauma and why do that? Especially because I grew up with consistency being one of my dad's biggest things (credible threat and all that) so I feel like, "Well if you lied to your kid about this thing, why do they have any reason to believe you're not lying about other things?"

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I suppose it's an agree to disagree thing, which I would be fine with, but I still find your icons to be unnecessarily insulting, and I disagree with your decision to make them and display them. I'm not saying you should take them down, now that you have, but what was it that you used to say about the political cartoons and such that liberals made of Bush? Which I used to defend as catharsis, but I honestly don't see why you'd need catharsis about something nobody has forced you to endure.

Now I've been as clear as I can about that, moving on.

I'm sorry you have had that view of the holiday forced on you. One reason I've always been grateful for the fact that my immediate family is so separated from my extended is that we mostly escape those parts of the Christmas tradition that I might find extraneous or that might take away from the meaning for me. My extended family's beliefs and values are often problematic for me, but I don't have to deal with them often. My immediate family, thank goodness, mostly suits me very well.

Aw, you should come to Vespers. It'd be great to see you, and as it's quite early this year (the 4th, I think that's just two weeks from Sunday), it won't be so insanely hectic a time here.

I guess I long ago came at least a little to terms with the fact that I will always be at odds with my society and culture in one way or another. As this particular aspect is one I find it very easy to counter in my own life, it doesn't bother me nearly so much.

I probably won't end up actually using the Santa icons (and I did cut-tag). Santa's pretty pervasive -- including in churches *rage* -- and gets taken for granted as a cultural given. I was largely just being snarky 'cause I couldn't resist using the line I heard on Without a Trace rather than being cathartic, though I do get somewhat cathartically rageful when I actually get going on discussion. Point taken re: insultingness, though I still don't think they're all that bad. But as I've said, I do see how someone for whom the Santa tradition had not been one of outright lying would be upset by them.

It'll be interesting to see how we do Christmas after my grandma dies.

It would be really lovely to see you. And with Emma going to England, it would be great to get to see her before next summer. Will check my calendar when I get home tonight and if I'm available I'll e-mail Emma.

I guess I long ago came at least a little to terms with the fact that I will always be at odds with my society and culture in one way or another. As this particular aspect is one I find it very easy to counter in my own life, it doesn't bother me nearly so much.

I'm usually relatively at peace with the fact that I don't fit most anywhere, and mostly I just get growly about the Santa thing rather than all out rageful, but it varies.

in which I have Santa issues

Re: the defense, er, doesn't rest

Re: the defense, er, doesn't rest